Yeah, but it’s not sanitary to “only touch your pants.”

Last time you took a shit, you touched those same parts of your pants, then washed your hands afterwards.

Beer is arguably the foundation of human society. Grain (and the harvesting of it) is a building block of civilization, and beer is inextricably linked to that.

There was a dude in Seattle who went by Phoenix Jones. He fashioned himself a masked vigilante, roaming the streets saving people from muggings and assaults.

Turns out he was mostly just picking fights with drunk frat guys. And we’re pretty sure he was dealing drugs and using the superhero facade to beat up his competition.

Yup. My partner’s dad speaks Spanish, German and English. As he gets older, he’s increasingly unsure which one he’s speaking.

I’m a native English speaker, speak ok German, and only a bit of Spanish. Communication is kinda tough.

Same. If somebody speaks to me in Spanish, half the time I react by speaking German.

If I can touch em, they’re real.

https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/cat-distribution-system

Cat Distrubution System at work.

There are a bunch of aptronymic last names, especially in English culture. The Baker family, the Tanner family, the Shoemaker family etc.

Don’t ask about the Dickinsons.

I woke up every day worried that we’d nuked Spain overnight.

A buddy of mine is a wine steward. He quit smoking and said “Holy shit I can taste wine again. I’ve just been making it up for years!”

CAT5 was right there…