One time when my kids were little I was at Walmart and I suddenly realized I didn’t know where my son was and he was just little. So I was like, oh my god, where’s Buddy? Where’s Buddy? Where’s Buddy? And he busted up laughing because I was fucking holding him.

Insomnia does weird things to you.

Can I get some of that plastic action in my testicles too please?

And Yahoo, lol

I just wanna know who keeps all the candles lit.

He always looks like he’s got his face pressed up against a window

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Darktide too.

Rog Ally for the win

Have some snickers bars with that broccoli!

She’s the Andrew Tate for old British women.

I went down the rabbit hole on YouTube a bit and man, a lot of them seem to want the shit to hit the fan. These are people who absolutely lay down to go to sleep at night and fantasize about getting to bug out.

Wait, what… what did the words say?

I got so interested in it because I’m old and miss Pidgin.

jUsT gIvE mETa A cHAnCe iN tHe fEdIVeRsE DuRRrrpH

I can’t get past feeling like iOS is more like Baby’s First SmartPhone™ OS. I can get it if you’re buying something for a child, or like your elderly parents or something, but it’s all just too rigid, too simple, too walled in, and basically designed to keep unsavvy users from breaking anything. It’s like the child-proof cap of operating systems. Android phones are more open, flexible, granular, varied and innovative. I just don’t see myself ever switching.